Good players inspire themselves. Great players inspire others.

Start by setting clear, consistent gaming rules together with your child. Involve them in deciding game time limits, which gives them ownership and encourages responsibility. Use an app or timer to establish clear boundaries, allowing your child a visual reminder when their time is almost up. Pair gaming with a reward structure; for example, “Extra gaming time on weekends if weekday limits are followed.” This approach encourages them to see gaming as part of a balanced schedule rather than the main focus. 

Research and play the games your child is interested in or, at a minimum, review their ratings on platforms like the ESRB or PEGI to understand what’s appropriate. Create a habit of “family game time” once a week where you play together. This not only helps you monitor content firsthand but also opens a discussion about what they’re experiencing and helps build trust. Many consoles and devices also offer parental controls that allow you to set filters for age-appropriate content. 

First, establish a "wind-down" period before bed where screens are off and low-stimulation activities like reading are encouraged. Gradually transition them away from intense games in the evening by offering alternative activities or low-key games that won’t disrupt their sleep schedule. If mood swings are apparent, use a gaming log to track their behavior before and after gaming sessions, helping you identify which games or gaming patterns are linked to negative changes. This can guide you in adjusting playtime or game choices to encourage better habits.

 Present gaming as one part of a “daily quest” that includes other activities, such as homework, chores, or physical activity. Make it a family goal to engage in a physical activity they enjoy, like a sport, biking, or even gaming-related movement like VR workouts. Reinforce this balance by rewarding them with extra gaming time for achieving their “daily quest” goals, which includes non-gaming activities. This structure encourages them to see value in diverse activities while satisfying their gaming interests. 

Introduce “post-game cool-downs” where you encourage them to step away from the screen, practice deep breathing, or talk about their frustration. Help them shift the focus from winning to learning by asking, “What did you learn from that game?” Praise their efforts, not just the outcomes, to reinforce that mistakes are part of growth. Consider creating a “game loss journal” where they can jot down what went wrong and how they could approach it differently next time, fostering resilience and a healthier relationship with setbacks. 

Explain to your child that personal information is like a “power-up” they should guard. Use analogies they understand: just as they wouldn’t give out their address to a stranger on the street, they shouldn’t share it online. Role-play scenarios together to help them practice responses to common situations, like when someone asks for personal information. Remind them that they can always come to you if something feels off and install monitoring tools to help you track online interactions and keep them safe.

Recognize their online friendships as valuable, but also encourage real-life meetups when possible. Suggest activities that blend gaming with in-person interaction, such as hosting a game night at home where they can invite friends over. For long-distance friends, try to mix up the online hangouts with virtual events like “movie nights” or team-building games that allow them to practice teamwork skills in a new setting. This balance helps diversify social skills in both digital and real environments. 

Teach your child that failure in a game, much like in life, is an opportunity to improve. Encourage them to set “progress-based” goals, like learning a new strategy, rather than focusing solely on winning. After a tough game, talk about what went well and what they’d like to try next time. Help them understand that emotional resilience in gaming—handling wins and losses well—is a skill they’ll benefit from in life. 

 Establish a “gaming night” where the whole family plays together, choosing cooperative games that promote teamwork and laughter. Use this time to learn about each other’s favorite games and understand what your child enjoys most about them. Also, set up a family “leaderboard” for fun competitions, like family achievements or scores. By sharing in gaming, you make it a bonding experience that strengthens your relationship and reduces tension over screen time. 

 Join online communities or follow credible gaming websites, YouTube channels, or parenting groups focused on gaming like Unleash Our RAGE. Also, consider reading parenting guides that cover gaming topics or subscribing to newsletters from gaming and family technology experts for example Wise Game: A Guide to Raising a Healthy Gamer